Entry D2005

I woke up at night

I looked out the window

Strong wind shook the window

And it started to rain

All green fields looked so wet

I was very far from a place called home

I felt lonely ....

I look for a good kind sweet words

And was no one there to give me

I turned my head toward the bed

I saw you lying half naked in bed

Snorer

The room smelled like a strong smell of cigarettes

You were always smoking in bed

I never liked it

I went downstairs to make myself a cup of tea

I sat on the couch

I thought

What am I doing here?

Why am I here?

Where all the love you promised me?

Do I even love myself?

Do i love you?

Am I who I am now?

I woke you up at night

I told you I'm leaving ...